Don't take pity on me!
by bibi 13ca
Summary: Elena's reaction when she finds out that Damon got bitten  I know it's not the first, it won't be tha last either


**N**_: So like the summary says, this is a confrontation between Damon and Elena when she finds out about Damon's condition (werewolf-bite), enjoy!_

_Thank you __**lacra13**__ for helping me with the emotions in here!_

_Also, thank you Valerie (2serendipity) for her beta-work on it!_

The soft unsure knock on the door is what wakes you up. You immediately know who's on the other side. You are able to hear her heart beat, you're sure you'll be able to hear it even from a mile away. A battle is now taking place inside your head. Should you just pretend you're not here and wait for her to go away, or should you talk to her?

You know very well why she's here. She found out you got bitten by a werewolf. You make a mental note to _pretend_ you'll kill your big-mouth of a brother later. She's here to take pity on you. Man, how you hate that!

Damon Salvatore doesn't want anyone's pity. _Especially_ not hers….

You want her forgiveness, no, scratch that! You _need_ her forgiveness; but _not_ her pity, _never_ her pity.

You try to turn around but the pain stops you. You can't suppress a loud groan…so much for pretending you're not here….

"Damon…" you hear her soft voice call you. You always think your name sounds amazingly perfect coming from her sweet, sweet mouth. And the way she looks at you; you feel like she looks directly into your heart. But wait, you don't have a heart. That's a lie, Damon, a fucking lie. You have a heart! Even if it doesn't beat, it's there and it breaks every time you look at her and she's sad or upset; every time you watch her with your brother; every time she tells you she loves him… and it's always going to be him. See Salvatore, you do have a heart! It just belongs to _her… I_t's always belonged to _her _for a long time now.

You decide to crawl out of the bed and put your best 'I'm perfectly fine' face on. You make your way towards the door, slowly…very slowly because you feel like your head might explode from the pain. You open the door and there she is…all beautiful and perfect. You expect to see a look of pity all over her face; then you expect her to tell you she 'cares' about you. Damn her, she's always pushing that word down your throat. But she surprises you yet again. Her eyes are sparkly and her breath heavy like she came here running. You watch her chest rise and fall for a second: it just hypnotizes you. Even before the door is fully opened, she storms in and starts punching you in the chest with her ridiculously small fists.

"You, you…how could you? Not telling me you got bitten by a werewolf, what on earth were you thinking? Don't you think that after everything we've been through, I have the right to know? You selfish pain in the ass…you…"

She's angry, that much you can tell, but you're a bit confused. You did it to protect her. She didn't need to know you are dying, because she has enough to deal with already. Why is she angry? Doesn't she know how much it will hurt you to watch her suffer? You don't deserve her…you don't deserve her to care for you. You're no good…she should know that by now.

"Yeah, let's not make a fuss about it, ok?"

She looks at you like you're crazy. You are…in many ways she made you like this.

"Are you…Damon you…"

"Are going to finish that sentence any time soon? I have plans."

"Plans, what plans?"

"I'm planning on getting really drunk and avoiding all of you chaotic people."

"That's your plan?" she asks and you can read the disappointment in her voice.

"Do you have a better one?"

"Damon…you're not going to die, we will find a cure. You'll be fine…"

Her optimism hurts you more than it gives you hope. You hate being _hurt_, so you transform it into _sarcasm_, just like you _always_ do.

"Elena, _wake_ up, I'm dying and there's nothing _you_ or anyone else can do about it. This…" you say, pulling up your sleeve and revealing the red, burning wound, "…you see this? It's a werewolf bite Elena, it's _fatal_ to vampires. It hurts like shit and it's getting worse…. There's no cure, so I _am_ going to die. You have to stop that, stop wanting to save me, I can't be saved!" you are not talking just about the bite anymore; you're talking about the broken soul that lies inside you, that can't be saved.

But you want to, you want her to save you…she never will…but you still want her to.

"No…I will. I'll find a way to save you…"

"You can't, damn it!" you take her hands and push her against the nearest wall, your palms on each side of her head. Your body creams in pain, every organ inside feels like it's on fire. "Get out, Katherine, I don't want to see you!" you yell.

"Damon, I…" you hear her say, her voice just a whisper. You really don't want her here, Katherine is the one person you _don't_ want to see right now.

"I told you to get the fuck out…" your hand pushes against her throat, your face so close to her you're almost kissing her. You want to _kiss_ her…you want to _kill_ her…you don't know what you want anymore. The woman ruined your life and your brother's life, she deserves to die. But you can't kill her, something's stopping you. Something inside you wants to protect the woman that's captive in your arms. She's trying to break free; she's trying to tell you something. You let go, just a bit so she'll be able to talk.

"Damon…I'm…I'm Elena. I'm not Katherine; you have to let me go…you're hurting me, Damon, please!" she can barely talk and she's crying, her heart beats fast, so fast…wait, she has a heartbeat?

"Oh God, Elena…I'm sorry, I'm so sorry…" you mumble once you realize your mistake. "You have to go, you can't be here…I can hurt you!" you tell her.

"No, I'm not going anywhere. You won't hurt me, I won't let you. I'll remind you of who _I_ am…I'll remind you of who _you_ are."

"Elena…"

"Damon, I'm not leaving you."

"Why, why won't you let go? I've hurt you, so many times…I…Elena, you have to let go, and you have to let _me_ go!"

She's crying; her sobs making her body shiver. She's close to you, so close you can feel every vibration. You look in her eyes and the pain in them makes your heart break into a million pieces.

"I can't…"

"You can't what?"

"I can't let you go…I don't _want_ to let you go. I lost so many people already…I can't lose you too, Damon, I just can't. I know you think that I hate you for everything you did, but I don't. I understand why you did what you did. Hell, I would probably push by blood down your throat too if I thought that would keep you from dying."

You look at the shaking girl in front of you. You don't really know what to do: 'comfort' is not exactly your middle name. So you go with the instinct and you wrap your arm around her slowly, pulling her close to you. You take a deep breath, inhaling her scent. She smells so good. You feel her wet tears on your throat. Her tears are so hot; they sear your skin. You feel her fingers curl into the material of your shirt. Her grip is so tight, but it doesn't hurt you.

And that's it. That's all it takes for you to want to fight. You decide to fight for her…you know you're a fool to even begin to believe you have a chance to survive, but you'll do anything for her, even if that means being a fool…. But then again, you've always been a fool for love…

**N**: _Review and tell me what you think!_


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